When You Come Back From Lunch...

"PatBateman" (PatBateman) 01/15/2020 at 13:39 • Filed to: NSX, NSEXY, Acura NSX, ACURA, Lunchlopnik, STOP READING MY TAGS

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...and the first thing you see in the parking garage takes your breath away. Shiftyboi. I told the security guard that this is the baddest car on the property. Not the most expensive or fastest, but definitely the baddest.

If you must know, I had a chicken burrito bowl, no rice/no beans.

Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 13:45

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What is in a burrito bowl without rice and beans?  

Jesus Arias > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 13:46

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Holy crap that is stunning.

PatBateman > Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! 01/15/2020 at 13:48

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It’s a burrito bowl with none of the filler “sucker’s bet” bullshit. Double meat, cheese, queso, lettuce, onion/jalap/cilantro.

I also eat low carb, so I’m that asshole, too. 

fintail > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 13:54

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Kind of looks like it has been sitting idle awhile, either that or driven a lot without a bath. 

PatBateman > fintail 01/15/2020 at 13:57

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It’s kind of raining/drizzling out, so the car is JUUUUST dirty enough to look that way.  I put my hand on the paint and you can tell that it’s well waxed. 

fintail > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 14:00

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Even better, always irksome to see cars wasting away in parking garages.  It’s a Honda, drive it, it will be fine.

CalzoneGolem > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 14:00

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... a chicken burrito bowl, no rice/no beans...

That’s basically a chicken salad, right?

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 14:33

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Have you considered not touching someone else’s car without their permission?

Textured Soy Protein > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 14:38

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MUST. RESIST. URGE. TO. MAKE. SNARKY. CRITIQUE. OF. THIS. NUTRITIONAL. CHOICE.

PatBateman > Textured Soy Protein 01/15/2020 at 14:41

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Lost a shit ton of weight a few years ago, leaning out for a mud race in May.  That, and bikini season. 

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/15/2020 at 14:42

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No. I can touch it. I didn’t drag my hand across it, but yes, I can touch it.

Should I go write a letter to the owner apologizing for such an infraction, then yank up the windshield wipers to snuggly attach said letter?

PatBateman > CalzoneGolem 01/15/2020 at 14:42

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Close enough.  With guac. 

user314 > Textured Soy Protein 01/15/2020 at 16:33

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user314 > PatBateman 01/15/2020 at 16:35

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Moe’s, Chipotle, or a local place? Either way, I’m now thinking Mexican/ TexMex/WhateverYouCallIt for supper. 

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/16/2020 at 08:04

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Nah, maybe just try being less of an ass.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/16/2020 at 11:07

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Me putting literally two fingers on the car to admire it makes me an ass?  Okay. 

PatBateman > user314 01/16/2020 at 11:09

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Local-ish place.  Freebird’s. 

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/16/2020 at 13:06

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A bit, but your response sure did. Cheers.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/17/2020 at 08:46

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If you don’t want that kind of response, don’t call someone an ass for a very benign action.

If you continue this, I’ll find out where you live and p ut my hands ALL OVER that pretty F-150 you got in the driveway. I mean, on the door handles, on the tailgate, and maybe on the hood. I’ll leave fingerprints all over that mug. That’ll learn you.

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/17/2020 at 09:20

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Wh atever, ass.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/19/2020 at 11:34

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THAT’S IT, YOU SON OF A BITCH. I’VE BOUGHT MY PLANE TICKET, RESERVED MY RENTAL CAR, AND OILED MY FINGERS USING RENDERED BEEF FAT. IM COMING TO YOUR HOUSE IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT WITHIN THE NEXT 48-72 HOURS TO TOUCH YOUR MOTHERFUCKING TRUCK ALL. OVER. THE BODY. The windows. The door handles. THE SUNROOF THAT’S RIGHT TRY EXPLAINING THAT TO YOUR DETAILER.

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/19/2020 at 18:25

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Feel better?

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/20/2020 at 11:28

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Nope.  Now it’s bacon grease. 

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/20/2020 at 17:40

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whatever you say, champ. 

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/20/2020 at 17:46

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I might just go out and touch a random car in preparation.  I’m an ass like that.  

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/20/2020 at 17:48

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The first step is admitting you have a problem.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/20/2020 at 17:57

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The only problem I currently have is dealing with oversensitive, humorless internet strangers that call people profane names for innocuous actions that have zero bearing on their lives.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/20/2020 at 18:00

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I mean, honestly, do you do that in real life? If I told a group of people (not targeted at you specifically), in person , that I touched a car with two fingers on purpose, would you call me an “ass”?

Second question:  Would you expect a passive response from someone like me in return, or would you realize that it would perhaps elicit a more aggressive, physical response from me?  

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/21/2020 at 00:25

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“A ss” is hardly profane, and nobody is forcing you to continue to reply.

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/21/2020 at 00:31

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I mean, probably, because you and I apparently have different opinions about what is and is not acceptable with other people’s property. I feel it's disrespectful to touch someone else's stuff without their permission. 

Second answer: lol.

PatBateman > Derpwagon 01/21/2020 at 07:13

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Laugh all you want; call someone the wrong name to their face for something undeserved and you might have a hard time.

But hey, what do I know?  You’re probably an 8 foot tall linebacker with nothing to lose.  

Derpwagon > PatBateman 01/21/2020 at 11:58

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OK, tough guy. Settle down. 

Mercedes Streeter > PatBateman 01/21/2020 at 16:50

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When I was brought up I was taught not to touch things that aren’t mine without consent . It’s an extension of “keep your hands to yourself”. Sure, it’s not illegal or specifically “wrong” to touch a stranger’s car, but out of respect for property that’s not mine I don’t. But yeah, you can touch it.

I’m not a mod, but if I were I’d advise you both to calm down and relax. It’s not that big of a deal to get all nuclear over. :)